Whiney – Hiney

My kids speak two languages: Whiney and extra whiney. It’s impressive, I know. We enrolled them in Whiney Hiney School of linguistics while they were still in the womb and it has really paid off.  Today they chose to speak fluent extra whiney all day long. Well the littlest one also decided to break it up a little with occasional bursts of sobbing over random things, which was a lovely break.  Sigh. It was a long day.  Last night we stayed out much later than we usually do which resulted in the kids going to bed very very late. This morning when my alarm went off for swim team practice I wanted to throw my phone across the room. Instead I just pressed snooze no less than 15 times. When I finally got up with only 15 minutes to get everyone up and ready, I found Princess Girly Girl was just sitting in the living room in a zombie like state. No one else was up. She made the decision to skip swim team practice and I supported it so that I could mope around in my pajamas for awhile.  Now I kinda regret that decision because it threw everything else off.  The past few days we have been rocking it.  We go to swim team practice in the morning, come home and do a few hours of school followed by lunch and picking up the house and then we head to the pool until it’s time to come home and cook dinner. What could be better than that? But this morning we had a project to do. Everyone fought. Someone went to time out. Someone else screamed because that was their blue paint. It’s paint guys. paint.  Then we picked up the house again and again and again. Every time I turned around there was another mess. I just could not get it clean. The dog eating random objects on my bedroom floor every time I left the room didn’t help either.  The 8 year old tried to cut her ponytail holder out of her hair by herself and instead cut out a chunk of hair. “It’s just a little bit” she said. Yes if a little bit is the size of a chicken leg.  The fighting and whining wouldn’t stop. She has my toy… That’s my quater!… Don’t touch me!…. Mom! She’s touching me… Mom she said that I eat my boogers…. Mom! mom! Mom! …..  Then they got grounded from talking and there was finally some peace. Kinda. As long as they weren’t standing in arms reach of each other.  Finally we got loaded into the van to mail Father’s Day gifts and run errands. I know the presents won’t make them by Father’s Day but at least they’ll make them in 2013 and that’s a lot better than I did last year.  The first mail place couldn’t help me find a package for the present that I didn’t have a box for so we left and walked back to the van in the 101 degree heat. The littlest one was screaming that she was cold. Telling her that she probably meant hot just made it worse. Because we all know that moms are always wrong in the eyes of a three year old.  Then we ran errands, several little stops in the extremely high heat, which was delightful.  The three year old took off her new flip flops at every stop and it would take me five minutes to help her put them back on the right feet, every single time. The people out there that got the views of my wide angle rear end should be thankful for flip flops. But then at the end of a rough day there was a nice lady at the last postal store we stopped at. She didn’t gaze wearily at my kids that looked like they had been splatter painted or offer me any little blue pills to calm my obviously frayed nerves. She just smiled and packaged my Father’s Day gift totally by herself, without charging me for the supplies to do so.  She laughed and commented at what I was sending and she told my kids that they had done a wonderful job at making them. It was the little thing that I needed to keep going when I was very hot and very frazzled.  Finally she gave me a discount because she said she liked the gifts that much and that delighted my soul. Sometimes it’s hard to choose Father’s Day gifts for your dad or father in law that have everything and don’t need anything. But the girls and I worked hard at making the guys in our lives something they could cherish and use for a very long time and to see that nice lady recognize that made my day.  However the kids did go to bed early tonight and tomorrow morning they will be at swim practice. Then we will do school work and run to the grocery store before we hit the pool for the afternoon.  My next project might just be a huge sign that says, “No more Whiney – hiney’s!”.